The Donald

I'm not happy with The Donald. Last summer, I made a bet with my cousin Chris. I said that Trump was running for president as a way to build his name recognition and brand, and that he wasn't serious. She predicted that he would win the Republican nomination. How could I not take that bet? Are you kidding me? Donald Trump for president? Seriously? Seriously. Now I have to buy her dinner, and let me tell you, I hate losing to her at anything. And it's all Donald's fault. In the beginning, I loved supporting Trump. He was an outsider. He was saying the most outrageous things, things many of us wished we could say but couldn’t because we have been brainwashed into being too politically correct. No one had ever seen anyone like him. He didn't respect anyone. Not Mexicans, not Muslims, not women, not other politicians, not even his opponents, whom he called Little Marco Rubio and Lying Ted. How could anyone take this guy seriously? While I'm not a complete liberal by any means, I laughed along with my liberal friends at this egotistical buffoon. Jokes we would make, fingers we would point, and we would laugh! Oh yes, we laughed. We forgot one thing. Millions of people agree with him. Take away the buffoonery, and he has an underlying message that is incredibly powerful. America is not great anymore. The world is laughing at us, but we can make America great again. People pouring over the border from Mexico are rapists and drug addicts. They're getting all the free benefits the liberals can give them while you struggle to pay your mortgage. Terrorists are Muslim, and since we don't know which Muslims are terrorists and which ones aren't, we have to keep them all out until we figure how to tell the good ones from the bad ones. We've lost jobs because Ford sent them to Mexico. I'm not going to let Ford or any other company do that to us again. America has been pushed around by the rest of the world and that needs to end. We're the most powerful country in the world and we need to start acting like it. As I said, powerful stuff. It's so powerful that his followers are willing to ignore the crazy stuff that comes out of his mouth. Remember in the movie Network when the guy leans out the window and shouts “I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take it anymore”? That guy would vote for Trump. Many of us have ignored the fact that millions of our fellow Americans feel exactly that way. They've been marginalized and forgotten by the political establishment. Their voices are not the voices of Washington, and by god, they're going to put a nutcase in the White House just to teach us all a lesson. What scares me is that he's now beginning to modify his message. He's not looking quite as crazy. He's slowly moving to the middle, which is where the election will be won or lost. If he is successful in his attempt to look more presidential, people might forget how insane he's been the last six months or so. He'll chew Hillary up and spit her out on the sidewalk. I almost can't wait for him to start calling her Little Lying Hillary. So now I don't know what to do. I can't vote for Trump for what should be obvious reasons. I can't vote for Clinton for what should be equally obvious reasons. That leaves good old Bernie, who I don't think can get the Democratic nomination. To me, Bernie's supporters seem to be leftover hippies from the sixties and modern-day stoners, all of whom are waiting for Woodstock to come back. Oh yes, don't forget to plant those magic money trees that are going to pay for everything Bernie wants. Maybe Bernie could borrow a few bucks from The Donald.